Have you ever noticed that when someone prefaces a statement with “No Offense, but…” what follows that but is bound to offend. That this is really just shorthand for, “What I’m about to say is going to piss you off, but keep in mind you‘ve been forewarned.”
I’ve heard this saying fired off over the years, and while talking to a friend recently I found myself looking down the barrel of her loaded mouth. Like a sociopath lacking empathy, she fired the words out, then completely unphased, watched as the sting of those words pierced through me.
This ‘friend’ of mine was in the market for a new house. She and her husband are pretty well off. When I suggested she look at a house for sale on my block, similar to mine, she had the nerve to say, “Your house is great, and good for you. No offense, but we’re just looking to move somewhere a little bit more upscale.”
Translation: You live in a shit hole we wouldn’t be caught dead in. We’re social climbers, and need to live among other tight ass people like ourselves.
I was shocked with the ease of how these words flowed out of her mouth, softened only by the phrase ‘No offense, but…’ I couldn’t help think if I had been the perpetrator of this offense in the past.
Let’s face it, “No offense, but…” is nothing more than a wolf in sheep’s clothing; a trap waiting to spring and impale unsuspecting, hubris free individuals with hurtful or opinionated comments.
No offense, but, if you begin to hear the words, “No offense, but…” coming out of your mouth, do us all a favor: Shut your pie hole, and walk away!
by Jean James Reposted courtesy of http://www.inthepowderroom.com
Ha! I couldn’t agree more. May those prefacing words never grace my lips!
Or mine!
Jean James,
I’m not sexist/racist/homophobic, but…..
Le Clown
Ha! Exactly. Words that preface but’s like those are as useless as the person spouting them.
Sadly, I’ve used those words. And I expect I still shall because, you know…. words that issue from our gobs at one time aren’t always the ones that we’d use at another.
Hey – I bet you’ve said “this won’t hurt” when giving injections. Yeah? 😉
LOL this made me laugh, perhaps I might have said that in my early days…perhaps.
“I found myself looking down the barrel of her loaded mouth.” That’s a great line, Jean. My son often starts a sentence with “No offense, but…” My first reaction is to duck.
Thanks! You’re right to duck, no good can follow that but. I’m an old Star Trek fan so when I’m feeling verbally threatened I do a mental “shields up” lol. Whatever works…